When Worship Becomes Meeting Expectations
This weekend I am leading worship in both our 9am and 11am services. They are two different services. Some people call them “blended” and “modern” respectively…but I have ZERO clue what those words actually describe, so I’ll just call them different. Different feel, different songs, different volume…just different.
My personal musical style and taste feels natural in our 11am services. I usually wear jeans and a t-shirt of some sort. We sing songs that I would listen to whether we we’re doing them at church or not. It just flows for me in the 11am.
The 9am is a little bit harder. I wear khakis or business slacks and a nice button up shirt that I tuck in. I wear some uncomfortable black or brown business shoes. Generally I feel uncomfortable, because it isn’t how I usually dress (though I dressed even nicer than that for my first job out of college). We usually sing at least one song that I’ve never sang. This weekend there are 2 songs that I’ve never sang in front of a church.
I think it would be fair to say that many of the people who come to the 9am enjoy more traditional music, have a joy for hymns, and are possibly turned off by the more raucous style of worship. I did not grow up singing hymns. I’ve learned a countless number of hymns during the last year, but hymns don’t come natural for me. I play guitar, hymns are written for piano and organ generally. I like to sing in English, and hymns are written in their own weird language (ok ok settle down, I’m joking).
I desire more than anything else that I could lead the 9am service into a meaningful time of worship with God. Yet I can’t help but feel overwhelmed with the expectations. Expectations that I’ll sing the hymn just right, that the drums won’t play too loud, or anything else. And don’t think that I don’t care or understand because I’m just as picky when it comes to the music I like (I do realize there are just as many expectations in the 11, but meeting those seems come to come much more naturally for me).
I am just a guy who wants to sing and play to honor God and to bring as many people as I can along for that ride. Yet I can’t help but wonder if the expectations will get in the way.
So if you come to Sunset for the 9am on Sunday, just know that there is a small part of me that is terrified of messing it up, knowing that I’m outside of my natural niche. The last thing I want is to be a distraction or barrier between you and God.
Now that I think about it, this is probably right where God wants me: knowing that I’ll fail on my own.
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Tyler Braun.
relax. walk in w/ an open heart. pray. the songs will come… and sing a capella the hymns before sunday. i think that you’ll find the easy beauty in them if you do that. what can i say? i love doing that getting ready for work….just my voice, just jesus, mindless of what i’m doing, letting the song just spew from me. it carries into whatever i do- lead or follow and even improves my ability in the “modern” mix…use them as a tool. relax, pray.
You wrote: “I desire more than anything else that I could lead the 9am service into a meaningful time of worship with God. Yet I can’t help but feel overwhelmed with the expectations.”
Having come up through the Jesus Movement of the 70’s [the music was raucous then too can you say Pass it On] let me say that the hymns, songs, or even chants the 9 am group does can lead them into meaningful worship just as much as Kutless can. Second, the expectations are yours.
We have a great God, with Great Power. Romans 8:28 is true and we can believe that the thought that has gone into these songs you’ve never sung and you leading are just as providential as the texts being read and the message being preached.
Be at peace… it’s where God wants you… Worship SHOULD be uncomfortable after all we’re standing before a HOLY God.
Alan
The lessons that God has me walking through right now have all had the theme of reminding me that God is not glorified in MY strength. I really “resonate” with your last statement, as it is what has been the focus of so much of my devotional life lately. We are weak, but He is strong.
Yeah Hymns suck…they are sooo last century.
And nice use of “respectively”
I say respectively meaning that people would call the 9am blended, and the 11am modern.
OK (deep breath), middle-ager present. I am at home in either service. Why? It has much less to do with the style of music being used in worship or the clothes that are being worn. If you think of each group as a type of culture to get to know and minister to/with, it might help. It is not unlike a mission field. It means learning the language and the way to present yourself, so as to not be in the way of the goal: worshiping our Lord. When preparing to go into another culture, one studies appropriate body language, apparel, protocol, etc.
If you were going to a different part of the world, our own country or even our city, clothing might need to be adjusted, so as to not get in the way of the message. The same would be true for the music selected and the type of parables/life stories selected to be used.
There is beauty in seeing the world though other peoples eyes and understanding what they are bringing, in the way of personal stories, to their worship experience. If hymns bring that feeling of hope, who wouldn’t want to provide them? If introspection and repentance happens best through a particular style, it is motivating to offer that style that is most helpful.
You can do it because I know how much it means to you to draw people into a place of worshiping our lord. That is your means of transportation: wanting to.
I hope you didn’t take my post as discrediting the 9am crowd. That is not the point at all. Just because it doesn’t come natural for me, doesn’t make it less valuable.
As for your comment…I totally agree.
I did not take it that way at all. No worries!
)
I have been there…although it was at 8 AM! with a blended service, while doing other more modern music at other services.
The key thing that I wrestled with is “performing a role” verses being myself. Those values are in conflict at times, as you so eloquently express. So expectations to fill a role are one thing and possible. Expectations to be somebody your not might cause an unhealthy rub. We all have to give our preferences, but we should not beat ourselves up simply because we do not fit comfy in that role.
Sounds like they are lucky to have you since you want to both serve when its not comfortable yet you seem to value being who you are. Kudos.
Thank you Rich, for these kind words.
I’ve been there alot, its a reacurring lesson that I never fully learn.
what I have observed is that heart motive matters most and God uses a willing heart more than anything else.
worship is my favorite aspect of church at sunset because its really good
Tyler
Thanks for such a well crafted and thoughtful piece. I could hear “your voice” as you wrote it and I think that’s what you have to find in worship leadership—”your voice”–be it in a different style or a comfortable style. What you are doing in the 9AM is equally important as the 11 AM- Relax and be TYLER and God will shine through.
If you happen to change the hymn tell them it was an arrangement and that you paid big bucks for it!
Wow you must have a lot of clothes to wash. I play guitar too, it is difficult playing a style you don’t like or that you are not comfortable with. Keep Rock’n
Relax and worship! We attend the 9 a.m. service, not because we love hymns, but because it works best for our schedule. I don’t mind hymns, they’re what I grew up on. However, I prefer the upbeat, “modern” feel of the 11 a.m. service. Regardless, we all just need to relax on our “expectations” of everyone on stage, and spend that time and energy simply worshipping the God we love! That being said, it’s good that you’re being stretched out of your comfort zone in the 9 a.m. service…it helps you grow and depend on God more. Keep up the good work and cut yourself a little slack (most in the audience would never know if you messed up a hymn!)
Just echoing the be yourself stuff – no matter how you need to present or the context in which you find yourself, let you, as someone sold out to Jesus and just wants to see Him glorified, shine through.
Everything else will fall into place.
(PS…we currently only have a “rawk” service – I’d love a blended one to indulge my choirboy past…haha)
Tyler
Such thoughtful comments and so much inpsiration and encouragment in these words. You will be fine – you always are. God is truly doing a good work in you.
Hmmm, maybe I will come to the Nine this week, after all.
The 11 has a pretty wicked set though. Either way is a win, I hope.
And then you also have the 5:00pm crowd
[...] I thought everything went just ok. I hadn’t felt this anxious about leading in a long time (evidence of that), and I don’t think that ended up helping at all. My prayer in the 11am was confusing to me, [...]
oh that stinkin comfort zone thing.
i, too, am terrified of distracting others when out of “my” zone. like next weekend…jenni somehow thinks im gonna lead a song. a song that is also a bit too high for me. ive led 2 songs in the last 8 months. im a bgv. thats what i do. thats where ive grown comfy and prefer. could i lead more? possibly, but it would take some serious getting used to. the only time ive been told it was less than it shouldve been is when i have let my own wants, insecurities and doubts over shadow the “task” (for lack of better words) at hand.
this is MY story. im not saying this about you at all, tyler. just saying…i totally understand what youre saying.
but odds are…you see and feel this more than anyone else.